


The Significance of a Sword

by RoseRedAndJadeGreen



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Arson, Backstory, Hindsight is 20/20, M/M, So I came up with this because the idea struck my while I was exercising, Taako had a sword in the show and I was intrigued, Taako's Very Bad Day, somewhat melancholy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-12
Updated: 2019-01-12
Packaged: 2019-10-09 00:49:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17396954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoseRedAndJadeGreen/pseuds/RoseRedAndJadeGreen
Summary: Taako Taaco has always been an excellent wizard. This didn't mean he was overconfident. He knew very well the dangers the world posed, and always brought a sword with him just in case.





	The Significance of a Sword

It was a cold Autumn morning. A hearty smell filled the air, matched with the sounds of grease popping. The thick curtains were drawn shut over the window above the kitchen counter, but the chef could see perfectly fine with his night vision. The meal he was preparing was the finest breakfast anyone could ask for, if he said so himself. It’s exactly the kind of quality you’d expect from the greatest master of the culinary arts in all of Faerun.

The curtains were shut to keep the cozy atmosphere, and let a certain someone sleep in. He figured his partner had earned it, after all his hard work.

 After he finished setting the bacon aside to cool, but before he could set to work on the eggs, he felt a pair of familiar arms wrap around his waist. Stifling his grin, he pretended to pout at feeling the kiss on his cheek. “Careful, careful! You’ll ruin the most poppin’ bacon on this side of the Feywild.”

 

“I thought you were the most poppin?” His lover joked, voice somewhat groggy from sleep. Clearly, the smell of food had woken him up.

“Nah, Taako’s the most Sizzlin. This bacon’s the most poppin. Keep up with the damn times, or you’ll hurt my image.”

 A scoff. “Yeah, yeah...Wouldn’t wanna mess with something this pretty.”

 Taako let himself grin. “Keep it up, and you’ll get an extra serving.”

 

This was...nice, Taako allowed. Cozy mornings, cooking for someone, affection at breakfast time.

 

His lover shifted behind him, and metal clanged, making Taako go rigid for a moment, ears flicking back.

 “Ah, crap. Sorry...My bracelet hit your sword.” The wizard made himself seem relaxed, as if he felt as nonchalant as he looked.

 “It’s cool. Just caught me off guard.” His heart raced regardless, and he swore internally, trying to calm the rest of himself down.

 

They stood in silence for a while as Taako began to make their eggs. He didn’t even have to ask how his lover wanted his. He knew.

 

“Hey, Taako?” Sazed broke the silence. “ Why do you still carry your sword around? It’s just, we’ve been traveling for over a year and never had any problems that needed it.”

 “Never hurts to be prepared, my man.” Taako brushed his concerns aside.

 “Well...It’s just that I’ve heard some people at your shows mention it.”

 

“They have? When?” Taako tried to remember if he’d heard anything like that, turning over one of the eggs.

 “At the end of the show, when everyone was leaving. I overheard a few conversations at the past couple of stops while cleaning up.”

 

The wizard frowned, laying a hand on the blade’s hilt in thought. “What did they say?”

 “Nothing much. Just that it was weird for a chef to be so well armed.”

 

Taako thought it over as he set Sazed’s eggs aside, and began on his own. The kitchen was full of only the sound of a sunny-side up in progress.

 

Eventually, Sazed broke the silence, tentatively.

 “Taako...Maybe it would be better if you didn’t bring your sword on stage?”

 “Nope.”

 “What?”

 “It’s not happening. I’m not leaving my sword behind, are you kidding?”

 “But Taako, your image-”

 “Is just fine, thank you very much. There’s no way in hell I’m going out in front of a crowd of strangers unarmed. You can’t be serious.”

 

“But no one’s going to attack you while you’re on stage! There would be way too many witnesses! And even if they wanted to get rid of the witnesses, how would they? Someone’s bound to escape and get the militia. And even if you were surprise attacked, you’d be able to defend yourself with magic!”

 

“Can you quit with the talk about that? I swear to gods if you make me lose my appetite-”

 “Fine. Okay. I’m sorry. It’s just...Kind of weird.”

 

The elf in question flicked his ears back. “Cha’boi’s not your average Elf, wizard, or chef and you know it.”

 “I don’t mean a good weird, though. You look...paranoid.”

 “Cautious. I look cautious. Understandably cautious, too.”

 

“Look, Taako, listen. Having a sword is kind of a not great thing when you’re on stage as chef. Especially when that chef’s a wizard. And you’re a pretty powerful wizard, Taako. They see the kind of powerful magic you do on stage. It makes them feel a little less...confident in your abilities.”

 

Taako huffed, breaking out of Sazed’s arms to walk across their small kitchen to the dish cabinet. His lover followed him.

 “Please, Taako? It makes people nervous. They start questioning how safe you are, handling their food if you can’t even use basic defense magic.”

 

Sazed knew he hit the right point, watching Taako’s ears flick back.

 “I mean, I can though? Better than literally everyone in the audience.”

 “But they don’t know that! Not to mention, it usually clashes with your outfits.”

 “Hey, I can make anything look good.”

 

“Yes. Yes, you can. But imagine how effortless you’d look, Taako. Like you didn’t even have to try. Besides.” Sazed wrapped him back up in his arms, and he knew he had him by the way he relaxed. “No one’s gonna be able to hurt you. I’d be the only one backstage, and they’d have to get through me first.”

 

Taako sighed heavily. “Fine. Fine. I’m not going to argue about this. It’s stupid, anyways.” Sazed smiled and kissed him on the cheek again, taking the silverware from his hands, and setting the breakfast table. Taako made their plates, then hesitantly, headed to their room.

 

Taako stood in front of their shared closet, and opened the door. Their belongings were separated by a divider, as Taako didn’t really dig sharing all of his space. It was a long few moments as he slowly took off his belt and scabbard.

 Holding the sheath in his hands, he took out the blade to look it over. It was a nice, decent quality short sword. The balance was good, the weight was perfect, and it was one of the first things Taako decided to spend money on after necessities when he began the show.

 It held a lot of good memories. Over time, he’d spent money on some minor enchantments. A lot of them were cosmetic, but a few of them were a bit more expensive and a bit more utilitarian. A minor poison enchantment, for example.

 Poison was one of his preferred methods in a fight. If you could weaken your enemy, you increased your chances a fair bit. It was hard to get rid of, and besides having a high enough constitution or an immunity, you had to spend some time getting rid of it. That created an opening.

 

As he thought, he held the blade in the air, and studied it. This was probably the most sentimental item he owned. Kinda funny, since he was a wizard and a chef, that it would end up being a sword.

He put the blade, that he had long since been privately referring to as Slicer, away in its sheath. And then hung it in the back of his closet. He felt...almost naked without it. Thinking better of it, he checked to make sure Sazed wasn’t watching from the doorway, and carefully knelt down.

 

Moving one of the floorboards of his closet, Taako opened the hidden compartment. A decent amount of gold, some long lasting food items, and a few fake pieces of identifications laid at the bottom, combined with a thick winter coat, a change of clothes, and a single locket from Sazed, that had a painting of himself inside.

Now, Slicer joined them, and Taako could breath easy. Replacing the floorboard, and shifting his massive collection of boots, heels, and flats back over it, he felt like this was the next best thing.

 

“You’ll be here when I need you, friend.” He murmured to himself, and stood.

 

As he went to the mirror in their shared bathroom to change the ponytail he had his hair in from cooking to a stylish braid, he didn’t notice Sazed looking in from the other room. He hadn’t noticed him before.

 

They had breakfast in silence.

 

* * *

 

Oh, gods.

 

Oh, _gods_ , what had he _done_?

 

He felt sick, and shook, as he sprinted to the caravan.

 

Sazed was already gone, and Taako was glad. The sounds of shouting in the distance hurt his ears, even though they were pressed as far back as they could go.

 

He tore through what had almost been his home, shoving his collection of footwear onto the bed, tearing up the floorboards in near hysteria.

 

He stopped, and stared.

Everything was gone.

 

His locket, his provisions, his clothes, his papers, his gold, his-

 

His sword.

 

Taako felt his heart break.

 

_Sazed_ …

 

Taako forced the thought and name from his mind. Now wasn’t the time for pain.

 

His first stop was underneath the bed. He shoved it aside with as much strength as he could muster, and clawed up his other stash.

 

Pocketing his copy of _Uncle John's Elven Bathroom Reader_ , he went into his Real Stash by tearing up the boards at the bottom of that. There was the beginning of his manuscript for _Seven Habits of Highly Effective Elves_ , a stash of a measly 10 gold, and a single dagger.

 

Taking the dagger, he headed to the bathroom mirror, and cut his hair all the way up to his ears, watching in a distanced horror as the golden strands hit the floor.

 

What now?

 

The question echoed in his head. What could he do to keep them off his tail long enough for him to escape?

 

The answer came to him from the far back of his mind, a corner he never thought of.

 

_**Fire**_.

 

And so Taako came to stand outside, watching the smoke billow up from his caravan and almost home. He watched it burn, just like the life he had tried to build. His mascara was running down his cheeks, and he didn’t even notice.

 

He felt very alone in that moment.

 

Then, the sound of distant cartwheels turning drove him back into action. With one last blast of his flame cantrip, Taako turned and sprinted into the forest, hearing the shouts from behind him at the now roaring fire.

He ran for about an hour, his heart racing the entire time. Everything hurt, emotionally, and physically. He was utterly exhausted from it all. He wasn’t sure if they were chasing him, and if they were, how far behind they might be. All he knew was that it was getting dark, and he couldn’t keep this up. He almost ran off  a small cliff in his distraction. Looking up, and getting very lucky with his perception, he saw a small, nearly unnoticeable hole in the cliffside. Making up his mind, he scaled up to the small ledge, where the crevice he found was just large enough for him to squeeze into.

 

He holed up in the dark as time went on, shivering from shock and the cold autumn night.

 

He had many regrets in his life, but right now?

 

Taako regretted losing his sword.


End file.
